Time Out!

I know that there are going to be far greater struggles in life than those we are facing currently, but some days, it seems like we are trying to climb mountains when it comes to controlling our very cute, yet stubborn, 18 month old!

I knew there were going to be times of struggle, limit pushing, nerve wracking, & stubbornness.  I guess I didn't know it was going to be this early.  Everyone talks about the "Terrible Twos" and even worse "Tumultuous Threes", no one ever said anything about messy months!

Recently, Reilly has really taken a liking to touching things on the TV screen.  It could be a dog he's trying to pet, another child he's trying to touch, food he's trying to eat, heck, sometimes, it doesn't even need to be on.  As some of you may remember, we've lost another TV recently (death by Wii remote) so we're pretty protective of the new one we have now.  Every time he was making a break for the entertainment center, we start telling him "No," to which he promptly looks at us, smiles and touches anyway.  No matter the diversion we presented, the harshness of a hand slap or the times we say no, he goes right back to doing it.  This could not continue. However, I was out of ideas.

I have a couple of friends who have children right at, or just older than my Rei-Guy.  I rely on them for help, strategies and sometimes just peace of mind.  One of them shared that her child goes to a Time-Out for behavior. This SHOCKED me.  An 18 month old in time out?  Seriously?  I had SERIOUS doubt that this would ever work.  But we had to try something.

So, the next time Reilly went for the TV and made contact, I picked him up, very calmly walked him to the hallway outside of his bedroom, (where he couldn't see into the living room or the kitchen), sat him down and repeated over and over in a soft voice, that he was in time out and needed to be still. I stayed in the hallway with him, since this was our first time out of the gate, and he just looked up at me with sad puppy dog eyes for the entire minute we were there. He didn't move, he just sat there.  When the minute was up (or as close as could be since I was counting in my head, trying not to cry that my baby was in his first time out), I hugged him tight, told him I loved him.  We also walked back to the TV so that he could be reminded that touching it was what got him in time out.

Sadly, the first time out wasn't our only time out.  That very same evening (at least he waited a couple of hours), he was right back at trying to get an ice cream cone right out of the TV screen.  (Really, these advertisements do set up kids to fail when it comes to this kind of thing!) So, right back to time out is where we headed.  This time, he knew what this was about and he wasn't happy.  Needless to say, this wasn't easy.  He fought, he flung, he cried, he hit, it was a struggle.  I stayed calm and held his legs down.  We stayed like that for one minute. Once again, when I had counted to 60, we got up, hugged, cuddled and went about the rest of our day.

Since then, there have been about a gazillion other time outs (all for the same thing!), but now, my poor 18 month old baby with big brown sad eyes is becoming a professional.  He just needs to be told to go to time out, where he promptly plops down and sits quietly (we don't even have to be in the hallway anymore!) for his entire 60 seconds, and waits patiently for the "You're released!" statement and hug at the end.  I think the whole process is still a lot harder on me than it is on him.

For example, last night, he was playing with the blinds on the living room window, when I asked, "Reilly, do you need to go to a time out?" and he replied, "O-tay." and then got up, walked on over and sat down.  At which point, I laughed, called him a little stinker and told him to get up.  Maybe I should have left him there, but he pretty much put himself in it, so I didn't really feel like it was "real."  Mommy mistake?  Maybe.  But he's just so darn cute...

Lesson learned...I'm proud to say Reilly hasn't had to go to a time out for touching the TV in over a week.  He's only been there one other time, for some unnecessary screaming and fit throwing--but we're making progress.  Who would have thunk it?  Time outs really do work for the "messy months!"