Last night, I went to pick up my sister and nephew for a little outing. It should not have involved farm animals...but then again, the greatest adventures are often those we don't plan. Or so they say.
Before we headed down to Nappannee, we had to stop for the eggs. If you're wondering what that means, it means just what it says. We had to stop and collect the eggs. From a chicken coop. From the neighbor's house, since they were out of town. No problem.
Only it was.
A problem.
A rather big problem really.
Here's the story.
Kim sent Brady and I in to the chicken coop since it was icy. Something about the door being broke, so we had to go through the fence, which is where the horse (among other animals) are. However, at the time, we thought the other animals were already in the barn. We've got this.
Only we didn't.
Brady and I make our way over the ice, unlock the chicken coop, manage to keep all of the chickens from escaping out the door and safely secure it back in place. We were inside the chicken coop, with some not so happy chickens. And two, LOUD, COCK-A-DOODLE-DOING roosters, too. Have I mentioned how disgusting and smelly chicken coops are? They really are.
Brady methodically checks all the "pens" for eggs. Nothing. Nada. Zero. No eggs to be seen. We're stuck in a smelly chicken coop and there aren't even any eggs to collect. Wonderful.
Then...We see it. The chicken who is refusing to move off her roost. And Brady spies the egg. Three eggs actually. Jackpot. Except, that chicken was not moving. Not budging. Not scooting for all the chicken feed in the coop.
I manage to stick my head out the coop, to ask Kim (who thinks the roosters are rather amusing with their loud chorus of COCK-A-DOODLE-DO'S) what we do if the chicken won't move. Her reply..."Try to move her." Oh yea. Easy Cheesy. Let me just move the chicken who is protecting her triplet chicks that will never be. I've got this.
And so I start poking. Have you ever tried to poke a chicken butt? It doesn't make them happy. At all. I finally poke her enough that she gets annoyed, but in the process, dive bombs Brady's head who almost falls into a pile of chicken poo.
This adventure is just getting better and better.
Brady and I finally make it out of the smelly chicken coop, only to hear Kim talking to someone one.
Two horses, a mule, a donkey and a goat to be exact.
Right outside the chicken coop door.
Brady manages to use his stealth like ability to get out of the fenced in pasture, and I was also well on my way back to the safety of the fence, when Kim and Brady start yelling, "You didn't close the coop, You didn't close the coop." Seriously. I didn't close the coop.
Awesome. With a capital A.
I managed to get back to the coop before any of the feathered friends realized they were a step away from freedom. I turn around and I'm not kidding...there are 5 sets of eyes staring me down.
5 sets of eyes who thought for sure I had treats in my pockets. So sure in fact, they just decided to look for themselves. I was pinned against the fence, just outside a stinky chicken coop with two horses, a mule, a donkey and a goat staring at me, getting closer by the second. One even had the gall to try to eat my sweatshirt strings.
I should have stayed calm. It probably would have helped.
But I didn't.
In my state of panic, I may have started to squeal. Loudly.
Kim and Brady started to laugh. Loudly.
I'm sure they only had me pinned (and I use the word pinned to really mean they were standing in close proximity to me and I was being a baby) against the fence for less than a minute, but I was sure it was hours.
Kim was finally able to call them off, through her laughter, and I could quickly escape to the other side of the fence.
Brady, meanwhile was laughing so hard, forgot about the ice, slipped into a rather arabesque move into the air, lost control of the container of eggs and fell onto his butt.
2 eggs did not survive the fall.
Seriously? I went into a stinky chicken coop, almost lost my life to 2 horses, a donkey, a mule and a goat and we only had 1 egg left to speak of???????
Awesome. With a capital A.
If ever I considered it...I've decided I'm not cut out for farm life. Ever.
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